The last few days, I've been working on my baby shower invitations. I finally went down and bought some cardstock, blue ribbon that reads "It's a boy!", and a hole punch, and I fancied up a cute little homemade invitation that I'm pretty proud of. I ran out of ribbon today and have to go buy more tomorrow to finish up, but I'll have to take pictures and upload them afterward. Because they're cute and I totally deserve to show them off.

A scan of the ribbon (used for color matching).

I have a post  with the story behind Baby Boy's name all typed up for you guys, but I'm thinking I'm going to leave it for Thursday's "Come October". I know, the anticipation, right? But it'll come soon enough and I'll be sitting here wracking my brain over what to post if I don't just wait. So though I'm excited to share, I think that's what's going to happen.

Oh, and I had a scare yesterday and had to go to the hospital. It ended up being nothing, thankfully, and it was kind of awesome to hear the baby on the monitor. He moves so much that we had trouble picking up a heartbeat; all we were hearing was movement, and even the nurse seemed excited by it. She kept looking away from the computer to watch my stomach, her mouth partly open as if she found it surprising, saying, "Your baby is so active!" She kept telling my sister to watch as my stomach bounced with little kicks and punches and rolls, and to feel it because she had never gotten to. It was cute.

I need to get back to business and remember to add myself to hops and visit you guys back. I know, I haven't been very good about it lately, but I'm working on it! I really hope life's treating you all well. And I hope I'm not missing out on too much, but at least catching up with your posts will give me something to do when I'm finished with all of this craziness.

I'm just hoping there's not too much crazy left!

That first appointment.

Little sister. :)

Linking up!

PS: I'm not the only person who sounds out the word 'Wednesday' every time they write it, am I? No matter how many times I've done it and no matter how sure I am that I'll get it right without doing so, still - "Wed-nes-day."

Always.

Another dad moment. Note: he really wants me to have a girl.


Dad: Walks into the room and picks up a quarter. "Okay: heads and Taylor's having a boy, tails it's a girl."

Quarter: Heads.

Dad: "Best two out of three."

Quarter: Heads.

Dad: "Wait, this one's the magic flip!"

Quarter: Heads.

Dad: "Fine, this is a test. Heads and CJ is a boy, tails she's a girl."

Quarter: Tails.

Dad: Scowling at the quarter. "Let's try: tails I'm going to work tomorrow, heads I'm staying home."

Quarter: Tails.

My sister and I: Cracking up.

Dad: Pretending to glare. "Heads my kids are smart asses, tails they're not."

Quarter: Tails.

Dad: "Never mind, this quarter's broken."

I just called my dad at work and told him to ask for the 30th off so that he can go to the ultrasound with us, and he immediately said he could get that day off and sounded like the happiest person in the world. It made me feel all kinds of awesome.

Mine rocks!
Source: etsy.com 
via Ashley on Pinterest

And now I've just texted my mom and asked her if she was going, and she said, "Yes yes yes." So I'm pretty sure they're excited, but I could be wrong.

"I'll be there with my happy pants on," says mom.

My mom's coming down in the beginning of next week and staying until the weekend. Then she's going to pick up Boyfriend, my sister and me and we're planning to go and see my Nana in Riverside. Her memory and speech are apparently really getting bad and they say she's suffering from something like mini-strokes inside her brain. The weekend is going to be pretty emotional, I'm sure. I'm already emotional at the drop of a pin, so fuck.

I think I'm going to stay at the apartment tonight, but I can't really be sure. I was supposed to stay there last night as well, so we'll see how everything goes. As it is, I have a ton of errands to run, and I don't even know why I'm still sitting around here. I need to start sleeping at night so that I don't waste my days.

I'm sorry this post sounds so choppy. I'm sort of in a hurry, but I wanted to post this because they're all things that are on my mind. I might come back and edit it later, but I can't promise anything.

While I'm gone, head over to my blog roll tab and make sure to link yourselves. Enjoy the rest of your Friday!

First of all, thank you, thank you, thank you to all of the new followers. It's been so lovely meeting all of you and actually receiving comments on the posts I write. It's refreshing after my past attempts at blogging, which spanned over the course of years and yet were never really read.


So today I drove down to my college and finally took the first steps into changing my major. I've been talking about it for a while now as I've been unhappy with English from the very beginning of my college career, even though it's always been my best subject.

Source: mycollegesandcareers.tumblr.com 
via Sarah on Pinterest

Here's the thing: about a year ago I walked into the college's Child Development Center and asked about volunteering. I didn't really have a reason and it wasn't going toward a job or school or anything, I just felt a need to try.

Basically the director told me that I had to take a basic Ch Dev class with the school and then I could come back and apply. I took the class, researched and wrote the speech for a pretty badass debate topic, passed with an awesome grade, and fell in love. I have wanted to delve further into the field ever since, but I never actually took the necessary steps. Until today!

I'm so happy I talked to the counselor. I've been feeling incredibly defeated lately, as my grades haven't been impressive (I was too unhappy with what I was doing to do it well), and I felt like I was pretty far behind. But I'm much further ahead than I thought I was, and actually only have maybe two or three more semesters of classes to do before I can graduate - and only because I'm planning to do it a little bit slowly, what with the pregnancy and the new baby and all.

Seriously...
Source: google.com
via Megan on Pinterest

I'm happy with my choice and I'm happy that I'm actually doing what I want to do. I started college before I really knew who I was and I definitely wasn't ready for it, but I at least feel a little refreshed today. I'm so ready for this!

---

In other news, my bedroom TV is currently hooked up with the one in the living room so that I can watch Netflix without having the Wii hooked up in here - the only thing is, I have to watch whatever's playing in that room. My sister is currently in search mode typing in things like "Tay sucks" (that's me!) and "Barney" and other children's shows. And now we're watching Yo Gabba Gabba. My sister is sixteen.

My family is weird.

My dad, talking to his baby daughter:


"Do you see that poster? It's Twilight.

"Yeah, soon you'll be like, *pretends to swoon*

"You'll be like, 'Vampires can date me!'

"Well you know what? Never.

"Did you hear me? Never.

"'Can I go to my friend's house?' Never!

"'Can I date?' Never.

"Yeah, I like that word.

"'Never.'"

It rained last night. Poured, actually. It started when I drove Boyfriend home and didn't stop until I went to sleep, from what I could hear. The lightning was beautiful, but not being able to see the road I was driving on wasn't so much. I love thunder storms, though, and haven't seen one in quite a while, so since I didn't crash on the way home and had somewhere dry to lie and listen, I still conclude that it was awesome.

by StockProject1 via deviantart

Here's some background for what I'm about to delve into: on top of being pregnant I have a baby (half-) sister, CJ, named after her mother and my grandmother. She was born on Mother's Day (I love that) and will therefore only be a month old on Wednesday; oddly, my dad didn't tell us that his girlfriend was pregnant with her until she was 7 months along.

The point of telling you this is that Daniel got to meet CJ yesterday. It was ridiculously adorable watching him hold her and talk to her in that voice that every person seems to instinctively have when they're in the presence of an infant - even if he did look a little awkward doing it all. Not that I think he looked wrong, I love seeing him interact with children, but he seemed mildly uncomfortable.

I think he was nervous. I put her in his arms so that he could try feeding her, but he didn't take over holding the bottle, and then when I helped him move her to his shoulder to be burped, he patted her back about three times before looking at me and saying, "I have no idea what I'm doing."

Still though, it was perfect. I love the way he smiled at me when I was cuddling with her, the way he was imagining what our lives are going to be like in just a few months. I love the way he got all fumbly (is that even a word?) when trying to rearrange her, and the way he sat with his arms awkwardly positioned because he didn't want to move them and risk waking her up when she looked so peaceful. I seriously can't wait until it's our baby he's looking totally confused about.

I've been feeling really strange lately. What's funny is that the days I turned eighteen, nineteen, twenty, I felt like I was an adult. I was so bothered by my father for not realizing that I suddenly metamorphosed into an independent person, who deserved to leave and enter when she pleased and to do so without asking permission, for not realizing that I was capable of making my own decisions.

But now I'm twenty and pregnant and I couldn't feel more like a child. I have to be ready for this and I'm preparing for it. I'm incredibly happy with my life and I know that I'm going to do as wonderfully as a young mother possibly can - because even though I never truly wanted kids or a marriage or a family before Daniel, nothing has ever felt so right.

Still, there's no way I'm ready. And I don't know that I ever would have been, no matter how much longer I would/could/should have waited before getting pregnant. In just a few months there is going to be a tiny human being in my care, who is completely reliant on me, and whose overall well-being is my responsibility. That is so fucking scary. Seriously, I don't care who you are.

No matter what, though, I know that this life is going to be wonderful.